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our thoughts on...

The Story of a Disturbed DBZ Webmaster

I'm sure you're tired of reading my mindless angry rants about FUNimation, so I have decided to give you something different. My real thoughts on FUNimation.

From the top as they say.

Art class, 10th grade: Two kids, Chris DesLauriers and Steve Valetta were talkin on the other side of the room. Very loudly, might I add. They were saying something about this show... Dragonball Z was it? I guess so... I went to investigate.

They told me about this "japanimation" show, Dragonball Z. It was about a guy with a stupid name flying around like superman and fighting people.

Uninterested, I made my way back across the room to work on my current Art project.

A few days later they were again talkin about this stupid show...

Well they insisted that the show was "awesome" etc etc, I had to watch it, etc. Well I forgot about it for a couple days and then I finally watched it.

Well everyone had the same name and looked exactly the same. What a stupid show.

I think I had started watchin' it just as Goku was leaving for Nameksei... or maybe at the end of the Saiyajin Saga... hmmm...

The show wasn't that bad... I lost interest. It did nothing for me.

A few days later, Chris told me to keep watchin' it cause normally they kicked each others' asses. Naturally I stuck with it and eventually saw some fighting action.

Eventually I got hooked! I couldn't get enough of this awesome show! And I guess that Japanese people believe in different dimensions and when you die you go there. Hmm, what a weird culture.

I remember thinking that DBZ must be a really pussy anime with no blood or swearing. I thought it was probably the laughing stock of Japan because of the lame material.

I was your typical dubbie. "Saiyan", "Master Roshi" and "King Kai" were all part of my vocab. And, yes, I did spurt the occasional "kah maya maya". I also knew that the names were different. But I thought, hey, I watch the American version, I'm gonna call them the American names.

Somehow I found out that the Japanese version had all kinds of blood and swearing. I didn't think much of it cause I thought it might not be true anyhow. Besides, where was all the blood in the English dub?

One day I sought the answer to these mysteries! I got online and looked up 'Uncensored DBZ'. You'll never believe what site I found! DBZ Uncensored... ^_-

I read for a solid 2 hours on how badly the dub was ruined.

Voice Actors.

Ok, everyone knows that the voice actors suck. But do you guys know why? No, it isn't because they are librarians. No, it isn't because Gen hired people with no training in the voice acting field.

For these reasons, FUNimation's voice "actors" do anything but:

First of all, Christopher Sabat is to blame. He is the guy in charge of hiring voice talent. Well our little Christopher has had a life long dream to be a voice actor, so this was his perfect opportunity to live out his fantasy while ruining a great show. Well when Chris hired the voice acting, he did his "best" to find people that sounded like they "fit the character". You know, instead of finding people that sound like the Japanese actors.

I really don't think that Chris has seen the Japanese episodes to tell the honest truth...

Actually, that leads me to my next point. Chris doesn't show the Japanese episodes to any of the actors. Think about it. Show them the original so they can see what kind of emotion is going into the scene and what the viewer should get out of it.

It gets worse. Not only did they not show the Japanese episodes to the VA cast, but they don't show seasons 1 and 2 of the dub to the 3rd season actors! What is that all about!?

Think about this: How are the actors supposed to keep the characters' personalities true throughout the entire series? They can't! Because of this it makes them seem shallow and insignificant. The ties between characters is dissolved and they become unbelievable and mindless.

So what we have are actors/actresses that have no idea why they are screaming at this "Frieza" and they have no idea why Goku has become a "Super Saiyan". Why would Piccolo want Gohan to be safe? They don't realize that he was once an enemy... They don't know how Piccolo hates all but this small half breed Saiyajin.

Chris Sabat also figured that Furiza was a woman... He turned the most "love to hate"-able enemy into an old whore on crack. You wanna know how he did this? He hired his mom to play Furiza... WTF!? HIS MOM!! How stupid is that? Wow that guy sucks...

In closing, FUNimation sucks.